Put me in charge!

All right, every comics geek wants to be put in charge of their favorite company (or all of them). I'm no exception. So, maybe it's time to start thinking about what radical changes my firm, dictatorial but enlightened rule would bring to the world of comics.

#1 Nightwing Reboot

All right, I don't care what depths of Comic Book cheeze you have to go to. It's time to reboot Dick outright. The world doesn't need another sullen, angst ridden, hero. Yes, we know, Batman is a first tier jerk and no one raised by the Bat would ever be happy... blah blah blah.

Phooey. Dick as Robin was a character of joy. Too silver age? Not at all. I'm not saying make him a silly, lighthearted 1967 character. Just give him a bit of joy and exuberence. How do you retcon him to be that way? I don't care. Have Mr. Mind crawl out of his ear in a future storyline... find out that some telepath or another messed with him. Say that this Dick is a clone, or is from Earth-N... I really don't care.

#2 Joker on Vacation

Joker is hereby banned from appearing in any DC book whatsoever for two years. After that, he's banned for another two years from appearing in any book that's not one of the Batman titles, or Birds of Prey (though he hasn't been used much there, the Birds have a definite score to settle with him).

He's simply over used, and over exposed. Every writer wants to take a shot at him, every editor think's he'll "spice up" their book. Give him a well earned vacation.

3. Grace Choi goes back to her bar...

What exactly is Grace Choi's role in things? Sure, she provides muscle for the Outsiders, but really, what does she bring as a character? She's as cardboard as they get. She needs to either be given depth, or shoved to a corner. Her old bouncer job is still there.

4. No major full company events for at least five years.

At least from the point of view of storytelling, there are few things worse than these "big" events that keep coming along. A writer is building an interesting long term story when... zap, the crossover of doom either derails the plot for as long as it takes to deal with it, or deep sixes everything. Look at Marvel with the X-Men at the moment. "House of M" managed to gut Academy X and Excalibur forcing both books into major retooling, dropping major storylines, or even the entire concept of the book. Sure, using these to "shake things up" can be interesting, but let the writers tell their stories awhile. Once 52 is done, sit back and let things roll for a few years.

5. Shoot any writer who pitches a "hero goes to dystopian future" storyline.

Ho hum, it was interesting and innovative when "Days of Future Past" was written. "Future Imperfect" pulled it off nicely. But, now, it's just old and tired. Was seeing the Teen Titans in the future really that great? Nope.

I'm sure my reign of terror will continue, but that's it for tonight.